There is one single word used every day that is hurting women in the workplace more than any other word… GIRL.
Seven years ago, I innocently hit 'play' on a video featuring Mayim Bialik of all people, and bam! It was like a sledgehammer to my brain. It woke me up to something simple, but incredibly powerful: the language we use, the everyday words we toss around, have a huge impact. A tidal wave kind of impact.
Seems trivial, I know. But here's the thing: it's a massive deal.
When we use the word 'girl' to refer to an adult woman, we're subtly undermining them. In the workplace it’s even worse-- It diminishes the professional stature of the person you're referring to. It's like we're saying they're not fully grown, or capable, or deserving of respect.
And that, my friends, couldn’t be further from the truth. It's definitely not okay. Not at home, not at work, not anywhere.
The most basic example of this I can think of is on the dating scene. You've got guys like Barney Stinson (of HIMYM fame) bragging about all the "girls" he's slept with. Hold up, Barney. Those ain't girls, buddy. Those are women, otherwise you’re going to jail.
Imagine walking into a business meeting and hearing someone introduced as, "the boy leading our marketing strategy." Sounds pretty strange, doesn't it? But now flip it. I know I’ve personally been called “the marketing girl” on more occasions than I can count.
Use this as a test: if it doesn't sound right to call a man a boy in a given situation, it shouldn't be okay to call a woman a girl in that case either. It's like we're still stuck in the schoolyard, and it's high time we graduated.
And, oh boy, don't even get me started on 'boss babe' or 'lady boss'. What's up with that? Are we still in an era where being a boss or running a business is so unusual for a woman that we need to add 'babe' or 'lady' to it? Nope, nope, nope. It's 2024, folks. We don't need to slap a gender qualifier on everything. You're not a 'female engineer'. You're an engineer, full stop. We wouldn't say 'male engineer', would we? Let's drop these labels that only serve to divide or diminish. Let's just call people what they are - skilled, experienced, and totally capable. Period.
Now, I hear you. My mom, bless her, actually liked being called a 'girl.' Made her feel younger, more sprightly. And amongst friends, that's totally fine. You do you, right? But when it comes to the workplace, or society at large, we gotta do better. We need to respect each other, treat each other like the capable adults we are. Until we've got full equality, we need to be mindful of these small but important details. So let's step up, folks. Let's be the change.
So, what did I do? I made it my mission. Now, when we're hunkered down for some family TV time, I'm the unofficial language cop. Every time someone on screen - or on our couch - calls a woman a 'girl', I'm all over it.
And guess what? My teen boys are picking up on it. They're noticing, they're learning, they're changing their own language. They're even calling it out themselves. Now that, that's a win.
Because that's how we do it, folks. That's how we build a new generation of equality champions, of feminists. It starts at home, with us, with our words.
So, how about we all get on board with this? Let's:
Be mindful of our words: Notice when you're saying 'girl' when you mean 'woman', or 'guys' when you're talking to or about women.
Correct ourselves: Slip-ups happen, but the trick is to correct ourselves and learn.
Educate the folks around us: Gently call out the missteps you hear from others. It's about education, not confrontation.
This is our call to arms, folks. It's time to step up, to use our words wisely, and to shape a better, fairer world. I reckon we're up for the task.
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